


Empty Fate

by Nehasy



Category: Tenkuu no Escaflowne | The Vision of Escaflowne
Genre: Alcohol, Explicit Language, Implied past Dilandau/Miguel, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Suicidal Thoughts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-23
Updated: 2017-01-23
Packaged: 2018-09-19 10:28:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,036
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9436112
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nehasy/pseuds/Nehasy
Summary: One night on top of the Crusade, Gaddes asks Dilandau an innocent question and gets a not so innocent answer.





	

**Author's Note:**

> I don't own Vision of Escaflowne or any of the characters.  
> This takes place in the first two weeks of Dragon in the Ashes.  
> Written for Escaflowne Week 2017 with the prompt - Future

                “Do you ever think about the future?”  Gaddes asked as the two of them lay on the roof of the Crusade, staring up at the stars twinkling overhead, a half full bottle of wine between them.  The night was so still and beautiful, the metal hull still warm from an afternoon of continuous sun.  Off to their left, they could hear the rest of the crew enjoying themselves at a nearby tavern while Allen no doubt was working late trying to sort through reports from the villages reeve. 

                “The future?  Are you drunk Fanelian?”  A pale hand reached out and snagged the bottle, bringing it to equally pale lips.  Several long sips put an admirable dent in the vino before it was returned to its place.

                “No I’m not drunk you alcoholic brat.  I’m trying to have a normal conversation with you.  You know, using words that aren’t threats or screams for more bloodshed.  You might not be familiar with the concept.”

                “Hmph, sounds boring.  Are you sure I can’t just push you over the side?”

                “The Boss would never forgive you.”

                “So that’s a point in its favour.  You’re not really selling me on the preservation of your life.  I mean seriously, you didn’t even bring glasses with you.  I hate drinking wine like a barbarian.”  Dilandau huffed softly, lacing his fingers behind his head as he stared up at the sky, idly tracing the patterns found in the stars, noting how the constellations were all in the wrong position compared to their placement when in Zaibach.  It was yet another thing that didn’t fit properly since waking up to this living nightmare of a world gone mad.

                “So are you going to answer my question?”  Gaddes prodded, glancing over to look at the pale slender youth laying next to him, marvelling for a moment at how he seemed to actually glow in the silvery moonlight.

                “I thought it was obvious that I was avoiding it.  You’re not exactly the brightest member of this crew are you?”  Pale lips twisted into a smirk as crimson eyes shifted, focussing on the darker crewman, openly teasing and daring him to retaliate.

                “And you’re a shining bastion of Zaibach brilliance Mr. Burn it all to the ground and then torture the ashes for information?”

                “I never claimed to be subtle.  That was Folken’s thing.”  Dilandau snagged the wine bottle again, tipping it back and taking another long sip.  “Fucking traitor.”  He grumbled softly to himself, debating for a moment on whether to put the bottle down or not.  In the end, he decided to keep holding it.  He was done sharing, even if Gaddes had been the one to bring it… and its predecessor. 

                Still, those dark grey eyes stared at him irritatingly, urging him to continue speaking.  As if sharing such stupid pointless thoughts might create some sort of bond between them, thereby preventing him from slitting the crews throats in their sleep.  Astorians, they were so hung up on the idea of chivalry, honour and fair play.  They really had no understanding of how the world worked.  It was disgusting really to think that if it hadn’t been for the Madoushi and their sick experiments, he’d be numbered among them.

                A glance to the side showed him that the man was still staring expectantly like an abandoned puppy, hoping that sheer charisma and patheticness would allow him to get his way.  Showed what he knew.  If Dilandau could resist Shesta and his huge guileless blue eyes, he could ignore this man’s.

                “Hitomi used to tell the future.”  Gaddes continued, acting utterly oblivious to the albino’s reluctance along this conversational vein.  “She had these cards that she’d read.  I’ve never seen anyone as accurate as she was, though there was always the chance that she’d get a Vision.  Those were almost never good.”  Storm grey eyes glanced over in the direction of the Dragonslayer who was doing his best to ignore the sound of his voice. 

                “Granted, most of the time that was because of your crazy ass stomping around, burning cities to ash and slaughtering everything that moved.”

                “Yeah… good times.”  Dilandau allowed himself a soft chuckle.  “Whatever happened to the bitch?  Last I saw her, she was clinging to that demon king from Fanelia like a discount harlot.”

                “Firstly, don’t call her that.  She’s an amazing person.  Secondly, she wasn’t a harlot, discounted or otherwise… and how would you know what one looked like?”

                “I’m not nearly drunk enough to tell you that story.”

                “Fine, then I’ll keep talking.  Hitomi didn’t like to tell the future, she said that every time she did it, she was altering the fate of Gaea or something to that effect.  I suppose that’s why she left in the end.  She didn’t want to be like Dornkirk and force her own vision of Destiny on the world.  But, before all of that, she’d do readings for the crew.”

                Dilandau glanced over, curious despite himself.  He couldn’t fathom why anyone would ever turn away from that much power.  If he’d been able to alter the fate of the world around him, he’d have done so much with it… changed so much.  His beautiful Dragonslayers would have still been alive… Miguel would have still been at his side and that damn Van would have been crushed beneath the heel of his Alseides.

                Why was great power always given to those too cowardly and soft to make proper use of it?  This girl had shared the same power as the all-powerful Emperor but had run from it.  Folken had been one of the most trusted and powerful men in Zaibach, but he’d turned traitor, running to hide behind Astoria’s skirts because he couldn’t handle a few people dying in the name of greater glory.  It was sickening really.  Even that bastard Van had chosen to put aside his demon armour and return to rebuilding that dirt ball of a country rather than use his power to take over the crippled Allied armies.  It was as if everyone had collectively lost their spines.

                “She said that I’d fall in love with the heart of the dragon.”  Gaddes continued on, oblivious to Dilandau’s darker turn of thought.  “That it would bestow upon me the greatest gift of in all of Gaea, but only after I’d lost it.”

                “Wow… and I thought _The future is obscured by the shadow of a dragon_ was vague.  I’m assuming of course that you’re not sexually attracted to actual dragons.   Feel free not to correct me of this, because I share a cabin with you and I’d rather not know that you’re beating off to visions of big scaly lizards.”

                “Oh ha ha.  So says the guy who ran around with a homicidal harem.”

                “Insult my Dragonslayers and I’ll slit your throat Fanelian.”

                “Hey, you’re the one who mentioned that you knew some of them rather more than professionally.”

                “True, but that doesn’t mean you can mock them about it.”  Dilandau took another sip of his drink, emptying the bottle.  Sighing softly in annoyance, he upended the bottle and shook it a few times, trying to get the last few drops before giving it up as a lost cause.   “I don’t suppose you brought a third bottle up with you?”

                It was an empty hope.  He could see that the crewman’s hands were now empty.  Worse, the man still looked like he wanted to talk.  Maybe rolling over the edge of the ship wasn’t such a bad way to go after all?  Death might be less irritating than this.  No, it was still too undignified a way for a warrior like him to die.  Dammit.

                “So, other than your rather perverse destiny of sharing your bed with a fire breathing lizard, was there anything else in your future?  Spawnlings perhaps?  How about fame and fortune?”  He didn’t really care, but remembered that once Gatti had told him that these sorts of questions were important to ask when someone spoke about their future hopes and dreams.

                “Not really, I got all worked up over the whole loving a dragon thing and she got into a snit, packed up her cards and stomped out of the room.”

                “Hmph, what the hell did Allen ever see in her?”

                “Please, let’s not go there with the whole jealousy thing.”  Gaddes groaned, rubbing his temples.  “It’s creepy on more levels than I want to even think about.”

                “I’m not jealous.”

                “Course not.  So, will you tell me your future thoughts?”  The crewman pressed relentlessly, earning himself another soft grumble from the young captain followed by a dark glare.

                “Fine.  You want to hear about my future?  My future is likely going to involve being either beheaded by the Astorians if they ever find out I’m alive, I’m not sure I even want to know what Van would come up with to execute me for my crimes against Fanelia.  That is of course if the Madoushi don’t get to me first.  If that’s the case, I expect that I’ll be cut up into little pieces for them to study during which I may or may not be alive.  On the other hand, my dear brother is only keeping me around in the faint hope of getting his precious Celena back and if that happens, then my future consists of me becoming some stupid vapid living doll who will be sold off to some fat old nobleman in order to make empty headed Astorian babies.”  Dilandau spat out viciously, his voice dripping with venom.

                “You don’t get it do you Fanelian?  I don’t have a future.  I wasn’t supposed to even exist.  I’m nothing but a lab experiment that slipped its leash.  All of this…”  He waved his hand around them both, his movements sharp and full of anger.  “This is temporary for me.  My world, my friends, my country and my glorious destiny are gone.  I have nothing.  No future, no real past… nothing.  So leave me alone and let me contemplate my nothingness in peace.”

                Gaddes was taken aback by the pain in those words as well as the cruel hard truths behind them.  It was impossible to imagine what the pale teenager was going through, how isolated he must feel despite the attempts of the crew to integrate him into their team.   Still, he knew that he couldn’t leave him alone, especially after tearing open so many obvious wounds in the kid’s heart.  Allen would never forgive him if the brat decided to take a final plunge over the side of the ship.

                “Build yourself a new life then.”  He murmured softly, his voice sounding almost apologetic.  “New life, new destiny, new future.”

                “All of Gaea wants my head on a pike Fanelian.”  Dilandau scoffed in dark amusement.  “I doubt that my explaining to them that I’m only wanting a fresh start will mollify all the people whose families I slaughtered.  More importantly, I don’t want to change.  I like fighting, I love hearing their screams as they run from my fire.  It’s the most beautiful sound I’ve ever heard.”

                Now it was Gaddes’ turn to look disgusted as he flashed the albino a heated glare, remembering the countless friends who’d fallen to this little monster during the war.  How his own home had burned while the little demon had laughed in delight.

                “One thing Hitomi said that stuck with all of us is that we all have the power within ourselves to make our own destinies.  We can choose our own fates, but how others see us can affect it as well.  If you only present yourself as a monster then that’s how people will see you.  The longer you keep it up, the more of a monster you’ll become, and soon there will be nothing left but that.”

                For a long moment there was nothing but heavy silence between them, broken only by the distant hooting of a hunting owl.

                “Good.”  Dilandau finally spoke, his voice soft and almost wistful in its tone.  “Once there’s nothing left of me but the monster, do you think I won’t hear them screaming for me to save them?”  For once, Gaddes didn’t have an answer. 

**Author's Note:**

> Well... that escalated.


End file.
